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ATPM 5.11
November 1999



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Apple Cider: Random Squeezings from a Mac User

by Tom Iovino,

Ahhh, Thanksgiving!

For those of you who don’t celebrate with us here in the US, or a month earlier in Canada, here’s the lowdown on that most favorite of holidays (yes, believe it or not, a recent poll of Americans shows that Thanksgiving is now a more popular holiday than Christmas—they feel Thanksgiving is family-centered while Christmas has been overly commercialized).

First—well I guess this is only if you are the cook in the family as I am—you spend about three months worrying what you are going to prepare for the big Thanksgiving dinner. However, in recent years, I have discovered that you can help yourself a great deal by using the Internet. For instance, you can check out my favorite Thanksgiving food site here.

Then, only if you are the cook, you spend the days before the holiday slaving in the kitchen like one of those poor kids who makes Kathie Lee Gifford’s duds in Central America. Apple pies, cranberry sauce, Stuffing, fixins’ are prepared, and that rock-hard frozen turkey needs to begin thawing.

On the big day, you wake at the crack of dawn and continue the preparations, cursing the turkey for taking so long to defrost. Oh, and you also get to enjoy the tradition of pulling the “giblets” out of the turkey.

Let it hereby be decreed today: When I am King, no one shall be forced to put their hands inside a cold, dead bird carcass at 6:00 AM on a holiday morning.

That is all.

Meanwhile, during all this hectic running around, everyone else who does not need to be cooking wonders why the chef is pulling his/her hair out and weeping openly during Butterball commercials. That is, of course, when they are still sleeping until 10 AM, while you peel about three tons of potatoes.

Finally, all of this activity culminates with the traditional dinner. Ahh, the dinner, a time to be thankful for all of the blessings we have. And if you don’t particularly hate the relatives you are eating with, the day can be downright enjoyable.

And, I won’t even mention the joy of the food coma you will experience after being sated with the holiday goodies.

Well, as we come to this season of reflection and bounty, it’s time for me to make my list of things I am thankful for. So, bear with me.

Except, of course, at 6:00 AM when I’m up to my elbow in a cold turkey carcass.

apple “Apple Cider: Random Squeezings from a Mac user” is copyright © 1999 Tom Iovino,

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